I’m going to keep this pretty short and sweet.
He’s amazing, I love him, he loves me (it’s official).
We spent a glorious few days together over New Year. Every moment with him is a dream. Even when I got wayyyyyy too high and blurted out that I am in love with him. He handled it like a champ. He took time to reiterate his boundaries, to set my expectations, to express his concerns about our circumstances, and then he told me he loves me, too. I listened, I heard him, I adore him.
Finally saying the words to him out loud felt like such a relief. I had been so afraid of telling him, not because I feared that he wouldn’t say it back – I absolutely assumed he would not say it back, and I was entirely OK with that – but because I was afraid he would be overwhelmed and run away. That he wasn’t ready to hear it. But I know him, and I trust him, and I believe he trusts me too. Trusts me enough to know that I will respect his boundaries, and while I have immense depth of feeling for him, I will not ask more of him than he can offer. And that what he can offer is enough for me. He is enough.
I think it is OK for us to feel what we feel and it not have to mean applying a bunch of labels or rules to it. Just allowing it to breathe, and to be what we want it to be.
I got to see his band play live for the first time and had some teenage dreams realized. It was a fucking great show, first of all. And holy shit, he looked incredible up there. I wanted to storm the stage and jump on his cock, quite frankly. But I kept it together, and just enjoyed the spectacle. Albeit with damp underwear.
It was so good to have a chunk of time with him, letting go of the schedule constraints that we are accustomed to. To just be. I reveled in it, touched and kissed him as much as possible. We watched movies, talked, went out for meals, cooked together, explored the town a bit, drank a little, smoked a little, fucked a lot.
And oh God, the sex. Fuck. It’s phenomenal. Unbridled joy from start to finish. I’ve said it before, but it bears repeating; sex with B is the best I have ever had in my life. I can’t say enough good things about the way he handles my body. Absolute bliss. Nasty, dirty bliss. I carried the (entirely consensual and totally sexy) bruises for over a week afterwards.
This man is important to me, I want him to remain in my life, I want to love him fiercely. We will see each other again next month and I absolutely can’t wait to get my little hands on him.
Fat and Slutty 